The Blessings of a Godly Woman
It was early one year when my husband and I started dating. The months quickly passed as we got to know each other and began to make future plans. Dating soon turned into, “Will you marry me?”
Yes, that was an exciting time. The thing was, however, that my family had gotten to know my soon-to-be husband, while my soon-to-be in-laws lived far away and had not had the opportunity to see our relationship blossom. My husband had made a phone call home to let his parents know he had met someone. Then that turned into a call that said he was dating someone, which later turned into another call that eventually said, “I’m getting married.” Mom, my mother-in-law, Geraldine, rushed out to meet me. She was actually not thrilled at the news. These calls all happened within a couple of months of each other.
My husband had joined the military right out of high school. He traveled a lot during his military years, as you might imagine. Eventually, the military brought him to San Diego. He ended up having the opportunity to go back home where his Mom was happy to receive him. Yea! Her son was home again!
Shortly upon his return home, he received an offer of employment back in San Diego, where he had just left. Fortunately for me, he took the job. I had started working at Hughes Aircraft just a month before he started working there. We saw each other at work. It was a fairly small office. I really enjoyed the intimacy of getting to know my co-workers, like a big family. We both ended up attending the company Christmas party and it was there where we started to get to know each other.
That following month, as we began the New Year, our co-workers tricked us into a blind date. This is when we actually started dating. My husband told me he had dated, but nothing serious until me. He traveled a lot in the military, so there was never an opportunity to really get to know someone, before he had to leave again. Lucky for me, he was now permanently in San Diego and I got to know him and fall in love with him.
Going back to Mom, my mother-in-law. My husband called home and said he found a woman whom he had fallen in-love-with and wanted to marry. Honestly, I can’t even imagine how Mom must have felt. Here was her oldest son, never really had a serious relationship, had moved back home just the year before, and now had met someone he wanted to marry and she knew nothing about me, all in less than a year’s time. Now that I am a parent, I understand so much more and I can put myself in her shoes. She might have felt that she was losing her son. Not something I wanted her to feel, but I certainly had my part to play and I could make it a good one.
Right from the beginning of our marriage, I made sure to make Mom feel included. We traveled to visit with family regularly. This gave us both a chance to get to know one another. She was able to see her grandchildren, Jonathan and Marissa, grow up and create wonderful memories with her grandchildren that lived in another state. Summers were special, getting to spend it with the in-laws and the rest of the family. I think what she might have appreciated from me are the little things that matter. I made sure that we always sent her a Mother’s Day card and my husband always called her on those special occasions. We sent regular letters, as well, which included photos of the kids or the whole gang, and what we had been up to.
Although the Lord took her home a few years ago, I am grateful for the blessing of having had such a wonderful woman in my life. She showed me what it meant to have a strong family, dedicated to God, and that marriage is forever. I miss my mother-in-law, but I thank the Lord for the memories that I can hold onto and the reassurance that I will see her again one day.
The qualities I loved most about Mom were her desire to have a close family, always having meals at the kitchen table, the letters she would write to us, never missing mass, and all of the memories we created through the years that showed how much she loved her family. She made me feel welcomed and loved. I remember always telling my husband, "Your mother raised you right." Because of my mother-in-law, I am blessed to experience those qualities in my husband, through his respect for me, how he cherishes me, and how he takes care of our family.
"Her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her." Proverbs 31:28
What are the qualities that you admire most in others?
How do you see these qualities in your spouse?
How does your family see these qualities in you?